Eric, Denny, and I are all 13 months apart, Denny being the youngest, I'm the oldest. A lot of pictures from our very young childhood have me holding him...I've always loved babies!
When we were little with our parents. I, personally, can't imagine having three children, three and under!
When I was looking at family photos I found this one and it struck me, my grandmother, grandfather, and Denny have all passed away. My grandparents used to come out to visit us for months every year, it was so much fun! My grandpa used to relentlessly tease us when we asked for something that "that isn't for little boys" (or girls) depending on who asked. Denny LOVED to sit and watch Grandma cook and sew. Denny ended up being the best baker ever! Denny's specialty was banana-nut muffins!
One particularly rough Christmas...my parents had just gotten divorced and my dad was not providing any support for us at all. My mom was working like three jobs and it still just wasn't enough. In October I had come home from school to find that there was no electricity. We did not have electricity this Christmas Day either. Our tree had no lights and all of our gifts were from Goodwill. It didn't matter. That winter we played countless rounds of Monopoly and Clue by the fire at night and we all slept together to keep warm. (When the electricity came back on in April I was THRILLED, although sad to see those bonding moments pass for our little family.)
Our last family picture...our strange, totally dysfunctional family, gathered for Natalle's Christmas pageant at school. Before we went we had dinner together and took this picture.
Denny was such a good kid....until he wasn't. When he was sober he was funny and talented and a great uncle and brother. It makes me so sad and mad to think of what he robbed himself of getting so involved in drugs. Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever move past the anger phase of grief. I get so mad at Denny for dying, for not being more responsible, for not saying no to drugs.
But today I just miss him, I wish he were here to call and wish Happy Birthday.
4 comments:
So sorry, and what a loving tribute. I enjoyed seeing the pictures and hearing the good memories you had of your youngest brother.
*hugs*
Oh, Dawn, it is so sad that you should lose a sibling at any time but so young and to drugs is especially sad. I never know what to say in times like these but I am so sorry. I wish things could be different. You are my friend, Dawn, even though we don't really know each other very well and I don't like to think that you are so sad. Denny is missing out on a wonderful sister and family.....
What a lovely tribute. I'm just sorry you have to write it at all. (((Hugs)))
That was a wonderful tribute to your brother. I'm sorry you you had to lose him so young. *hugs*
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