Baby's Bigger, Bleed's Smaller!

Finally! The bleed seems to be getting smaller, the baby is getting bigger! Yay! The heartrate was 175 and baby looked good!



My next u/s is next Tuesday at 11:00, after that I see the dr on April 30th and if everything keeps looking as good as it has then I'll be on modified bedrest, with only housework and weight restrictions. But this also depends on my cervix length measurements by abdominal u/s next week and the 30th because I have thinned a bit and dialated slightly and so they're going to put in a cerclage at 14 weeks, we just have to get to 14 weeks, I shouldn't be on bedrest but a few days after the cerc is put in! (Unless I develope further problems...) Anyhow things are looking really good. I don't worry so much about the baby having problems as I do about my body failing the baby...so hopefully my body doesn't fail.

Wow, the baby in that ticker is really taking shape!

According to the due date they gave me when baby first appeared on u/s - I'm 9 weeks today...according to LMP I'm 10w3d - but we're looking at the 9 weeks as being accurate - so I'm due November 18th.

It's stake conference today - and pouring rain, so Kevin and the boys are home and hanging out here. Kevin does have a little cleaning up to do because we have a full week of help from our families and ward coming this week and the house needs to be presentable, so they're all up working on that. The boys made a terrible mess with popcorn last night!

Not much new and exciting is going on here. I am reading the 4th and final book of The Children Of The Promise, I'm going to be sad to see this series end. I have a friend loaning me the next part of the series next week. I haven't read this much in forever! I think since I was on bedrest with Justin! LOL Other than that, I have only left my house to go to the dr's office for the past nearly 2 weeks, so I've totally got cabin fever.

Well tomorrow is another u/s (and chance to escape the house for a little bit) so I'll be sure to post the pic when I get back tomorrow afternoon from the u/s! Wish us luck, smaller bleed and bigger baby! :)

Adventures to the Pharmacy!

Yesterday morning I woke up and my throat was really swollen...it was the craziest thing, I could barely talk, I was panicking because breathing wasn't even that easy. As I woke up more and drank some water and stuff the panic subsided and I realized it's just allergies. (which I normally have a few sneezes as things bloom but they generally don't bother me, however we all know everything changes when you're pregnant!)

So I get up and call the dr and they said to take Sudafed. So I send Kevin at 8:00 in the morning to find Sudafed. Walmart - nope, pharmacy isn't open til 9:00, Vons- same, Walgreens 24 hour pharmacy - store policy is they don't sell Sudafed between the hours of midnight and 9 am. Nice. So Kevin had to work and couldn't keep waiting til 9:00 for someone to sell him Sudafed.

I called a friend and told her about our Sudafed problems and she said she'd get me some. She went after 9:00 am to Walgreens, had to show ID, sign for the Sudafed, and can't buy more Sudafed for 30 days! Wow!

It helped immensely though, the swelling went down completely and I still have scratchiness from the draining of my nose, but eh, it's totally liveable now.

Good Morning All!

I haven't spotted or bled in 12 hours!! I did get up and do alot this morning though with Justin. It's COLD here and rainy and so I had to dress him and feed him myself. My friend that's watching him today though said that she would take Jakey too so I could rest even more because she heard him tell me he would not get the door because he's eating so I had to get up (stinker!)...so he's gone today too.

I'm almost half way through Children Of The Promise Vol. 2 and totally engrossed in it! It's been such an interesting series! When I finish I have a friend who is going to loan me the next part of the series. :)

I'm going to keep bumping up that ticker - it's beyond cool!

Anyhow, totally not much new to say - LOL, I am happy that I get to see the baby again on Monday, so that's something exciting to look forward to. :)

Another u/s, another cute baby pic :) She purposely did not print the pictures of the bleed, she says she wants me to focus on my sweet baby and not the bleed. But the bleed is a little bigger this week :( But it's ok, my baby is doing good :)

This week's pic:

Thumbs up:

My ward is awesome! They have totally stepped in where our families just couldn't be because of work and/or school and saved us!

The Children Of the Promise series, very good! I'm starting the second book tonight!

Desperate Housewives being new last night!

Kevin folding and putting away all the laundry yesterday!!

Thumbs down:

My butt hurts from sitting/laying whatever!

Court shows, oh my goodness, with the exception of maybe The People's Court, these are almost as bad as Jerry Springer!

Soap Operas, I've always loved them, but like 2-3 times a week or less, I feel like the storylines never go anywhere when I watch daily and I feel like, oh my goodness this is totally trashy!!

My baby had an ear infection and I couldn't take him to the dr myself :( I had to send my mom to do my mommy job!

So there you have, the short of it :) I had help here all day today so I wasn't on the computer at all, but I'm going to be the commenting queent tomorrow when the boys are gone, before I go to the dr for my ultrasound at 1:30. :)

Wow, bedrest is BORING.

I read a few chapters of the first book of The Children Of The Promise series (which is great so far!), I watched horrible court shows on tv, and I think I gained 10 lbs because everyone brought my food to me! I felt like the 500 lbs woman on Dr. Phil whose family was always bringing her food.

Tomorrow is our anniversary - 7 years. And we're doing Nada. It's ok though, the baby is worth it. Kev might rent a movie - but that'll be it for us. He's also got to do all of our laundry and fold and put it away and clean the whole house LOL. He says he doesn't mind too much (after a big fight about how he feels about my being on bedrest, he BETTER not mind!) so hopefully tomorrow he proves that it doesn't bother him.

I am so bloated at night! My mom bought me some new clothes - thank goodness cause I could zip pants in the AM and die by the PM.

Anyhow, the bleeding slows way down as long as I stay down, but if I even stand long enough for a shower - I start bleeding a moderate amount of red. Laying down it turns to brown spotting. Not as frightening at all. Our families go back to work and school on Monday and so our ward is stepping in to help with our kids. It's been really touching to see how concerned and helpful everyone is being, and how everyone's come together to help us out right now.

Well I'm off to bed - night all! Everyone, post an updated blog (Stacey, develope a blog!! I wanna click your name and see your blog too!! :) ) so I have something interesting to read tomorrow when Kevin moves my computer to a more "bedrest accessible" spot. Thanks everyone for your positive thoughts for us, I think my cute little baby is snug and safe for now! :)

Let The Games Begin!

Things were really going too smoothly weren't they?

Last night I was making dinner and I got a really painful ache in my back just long enough to notice it and then it was gone. A minute or so later I stepped to the side to grab something and "whoosh!" I stood there and thought, I just had a transvaginal u/s - it's the goop (this was the day after the t/v u/s). Finally I got the courage to go look and sure enough, bright, red, blood.

I called the advice nurse and she said that I had to go in because I'm RH Negative and needed rhogham. (This is the advice nurse for my insurance.) Anyhow, so I go in and wait for hours and hours and hours. They do a pelvic and I'm closed with no tissue, but still bleeding bright red. They give me an IV and take blood and run labs and give me the Rhogam shot, but say the u/s won't be scheduled for in the morning. I said, NO! I was going to go home and call my dr in the morning - I didn't want to stay in the hospital any longer. (They wouldn't call him and his message thingy wasn't working last night.) So they released me at 3:00 am.

I called my dr first thing in the AM and he had me come in ASAP. I got there and immediately had a u/s - baby is totally great, I have a subchoronic bleed. Baby measures 7w4d which is 2 days further than Tuesday LOL, and a heartrate of 167. The dr came in and I told him about them not calling him, and the message being messed up, and he gave me the number to call if I have an emergency and said he's so sorry, he would have been there if he had known and taken care of me himself. I'm on bedrest, he says "toilet, shower, fridge for like 20 seconds - that's it!" and I have weekly u/s' to check the bleed and the baby. My next u/s is next Tuesday. So far baby is hanging in there!

Here is a u/s pic from today - the bleed is the dark spot to the right of the baby


And here is the pic with the baby's heartrate on it - I just thought it was cool :)

Ultrasound Update!

My baby looks FANTASTIC! Nice strong heartbeat at 171! Little arms and little legs! So cute!!! Slightly on the alien side - but that's ok :) However, baby bean measures 7w2d so we're changing my due date from November 8 to November 18th - shoot! But as my dr said, my baby just wants to be born ON November 8th :) Which is fine by me, the week before that is Jakey's 8th birthday and baptism and our Primary Program (Oct 28th) and so I'm all for being pregnant instead of just having had a c/s during that week! :) Just the dreaded getting through the first trimester part I could do without! I want the next 7 weeks to speed by and then my pregnancy can slow down and I can just enjoy being pregnant.

OK I'm going to go find my camera cord, it's my mission today - must find cord so I can show you all how cute my baby is!!!

Edit: figured it out here is baby!!!!

Boring 8 week checkup

Boring is good though :)

I went to the dr today and their fax machine and computers were down. So they weren't able to get my lab results. The dr didn't want to unnecessarily stress me out by trying the doppler too soon (maternal layers and all LOL) and so he was going to have the u/s chick scan me really quick but she was TERRIBLY sick, so he sent her home. She promised to feel better and scan me tomorrow morning, so at 8:30 tomorrow I go back for a u/s to see the baby's heartbeat.

The dr said that one of the most effective treatments for severe morning sickness is B6 injections, so tomorrow I'll be getting one of those (he had to order some from the injectibles pharmacy) and he said they last about a week. Hopefully it's as fantastic as he says it is.

Anyhow so a really boring appt overall. My blood pressure was good, lost some weight...good stuff :)

Me-Me

So much pressure!! LOL

Four Things MEME

LIST FOUR SENTENCES YOU'VE NEVER SAID BEFORE:

1. I hate steak!
2. I'm so glad we don't have cable. (The bill yes, cable no.)
3. Whew! A negative pregnancy test!
4. I love cleaning the house!

LIST FOUR SONG TITLES THAT DESCRIBE HOW YOU'VE FELT THIS WEEK:

1. "Ain't Goin' Down Til The Sun Comes Up" Garth Brooks
2. Caillou's theme song, "I'm just a kid who's four, each day I learn some more..."
3. "Don't Speak" No Doubt
4. "I've Got Friends In Low Places" Garth Brooks

IMAGINE YOU'RE HAVING THE IDEAL PERFECT DAY. WHAT FOUR THINGS WOULD YOU BE DOING?

1. I'd not be sick, but I'd still be pregnant.
2. I'd eat whatever I wanted and not gain any weight.
3. Read a book.
4. Enjoy a peaceful day with the boys, with NO fighting.

MAKE UP FOUR CREATIVE NAMES FOR A NEW ROCK BAND:

1. WOW!
2. Kev says "R-Tards"
3. CenFULL
4. The Maydays (I'm not creative.)

CONGRATULATIONS! YOU GET TO GO BACK IN TIME AND ENSURE THAT FOUR SONGS WERE NEVER WRITTEN, THUS SPARING HUMANITY FROM EVER HAVING TO HEAR THEM. WHAT FOUR SONGS WOULD GET THE AXE?

1. "My Heart Will Go On" Celine Dion (they KILLED that song when Titanic came out!)
2. "The Macarena" Yuck
3. Anything Sanjaya has butchered on American Idol, I don't think I can hear them ever again.
4. "The Thong Song" Oh that was ANNOYING!

Ceasar Chavez Day? Are you KIDDING me?

Kevin's license got suspended because his former employer did not pay a fix-it ticket he had gotten in one of their trucks. We've been dealing with this for a few days and today it was supposed to get paid at the court house. We call and call no answer. But we're calling this little court branch in a tiny city a few miles away. Finally we call the big county Court house and it's FREAKING CEASAR CHAVEZ DAY! Who cares? Why are government employees off, paid, for this day??????? Seriously!

I could just cry, I hate his former employer SO FREAKIN MUCH. I can't wait to NEVER have anything to do wwith that company again. ARGH.

How well do you know me?

http://www.testriffic.com/friendtest/2952166

Freedom!

My boys are leaving for a week today! They're going with my parents to their cabin and my mom will be here in about 2 hours to pick them up! What am I going to do with myself for a whole week with NO kids!?! Um, sleep, sleep, sleep!!! :) I'm sorta excited can you tell? I'm sure I'll miss them, but that's ok, absence makes the heart grow fonder!

I'm also excited because I made it, my ultrasound is on Monday and I patiently made it through the wait to see the baby again!! :)

Ok, so it's a good day. Oh and my mom is going to drop me off at the park when she comes to get the boys, so I can visit with my friends! Good day I tell ya!

Oh my goodness!!!!!!!

Make it stop! Make the screaming and fighting stop!! When will it end?!?!

These boys are like having WWIII today! It's been a constant battle all day long, I'm about ready to throw them back in bed and tell them we'll start over again this afternoon. Jakey is acting about 2 years old and fighting with Justin over everything and Justin is just screeching over everything Jakey does!! I've tried seperating them for some schooling or a game but it's totally not enough!! They're both about to be sold on Ebay if they don't calm down!

I just started RV for them, hopefully watching the movie will calm them down. Have you ever seen RV with Robin Williams? Oh my goodness, it's hilarious! A really good family movie and Justin even loves it and he's still really little! Although there is one scene, oh man, it does not do good things for my weak tummy right now, if you've seen it I'm sure you know what scene I'm talking about!

So, I'll be 8 weeks tomorrow! I'm bloated enough to make wearing regular pants uncomfortable because I don't want anything to push on my tummy, but not "showing" either, yk? I have a lot of drawstring stuff from right after I had my c/s with Justin so I'm wearing some of that stuff just cause it's so much more comfortable. They're my "4th Trimester" clothes LOL.

Ah, I am so looking forward to this weekend, vegging and watching conference! It's gonna be great! :)

Just wanted to share...

I like seeing it get further up there in weeks! LOL

Total blonde moment!

On Friday when I went to the dr's office I dropped off a form for him to sign confirming that I'm pregnant for a change of insurance I'm trying to do. I called today to see if it was ready and the dr said that he looked at the form and there wasn't anywhere for him to sign...doh! I looked at the rest of the packet and I have his sheet and he has mine! Argh. LOL Anyhow he's going out of town Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday and won't be back til I have an appt first thing Monday morning so I might as well wait til then, darn it! I am trying to set up new insurance ASAP and my blonde moment is not helping!

I need to do an experiement with Jakey for science for our science turn in to his teacher for this quarter and some of them are so stinking complicated and they want us doing these experiements like daily....anyhow so I flipped through the book til I found one that I could do with him (we're going to fish with magnents). And I have to teach him to carry numbers today in Math.

Justin hasn't started his preschool work yet because he can't really sit on his bottom quite long enough yet, so he stands at the whiteboard and draws circles, his specialty...LOL

I'm soooooooo not feeling good today, at all. And I have to clean my house today because tomorrow a man is coming out to install a new dishwasher and on Thursday Jakey's teacher will be here for a conference. We still don't have a dryer and I'm about to lose my mind with how much laundry is accumulating. Kevin's work keeps calling him in at weird hours and he's been working 14-15 hour days so I'm not able to go after work to the laundromat. Kevin's mom will usually take a load or two but I usually go pick it up ASAP so my clothes don't end up smelling like cigarette smoke and I am not having the car until 10-11 at night.

It's raining today. Kinda stinks cause the boys can't play outside, is kinda awesome cause it's not so hot. :) I think this afternoon we're going to have popcorn and watch a movie. (Well they can have popcorn, yuck!)

Well time to get started on my massive to do list!

Holy Vampires, Batman!

I just got back from the lab where the lady took 10 vails of my blood! Wow! I know that they took "alot" of blood during my other pregnancies but NEVER 10 vails, I'm almost positive that is way more than ever before.

Mmmmm, watered down Lemonade! With Ice!

Just about the only thing that stays in my tummy is watered down lemonade with ice! I'm so glad something is staying in, especially something so yummy on such hot days!

I just got done grading some of Jakey's work for history. This past few weeks we've been focusing on events that happened in the Roman Empire during the Pax Romana (Roman Peace). This includes the birth and life of Christ. It was a nice unit because Jakey knew so much already about the birth and life of Christ that it felt like we were really able to glide through it easily. There was a point, when Jesus was crucified, where Jakey had to write a paper about the events. I loved his last sentence. "Most importantly, Jesus overcame death and was resurrected." That was not in the lesson (the ressurection). So I'm proud of him. (Also, those are Jakey's words spelled correctly, it would hurt my brain to spell that sentence how it was before rewriting! LOL)

I ordered a 120 page toddler/preschool worksheet set online (for download) and tomorrow will be Justin's first day of using it. We're going to focus on just learning basic shapes and colors and then we'll move onto recognizing numbers and letters. I am hoping to find things that Justin can do to help keep him occupied because Jakey and I are starting a very hard math unit tomorrow.

So here's a question, does this look like a second grade math problem to you?

487
-259
-------

??????

I don't know exactly when I learned to carry numbers and such, but I want to bet that it was NOT 2nd grade!!!! We're supposed to start that and cursive tomorrow. Jakey can barely print legibly, I think we're just gonna stick with printing for 2nd grade...in 3rd grade, I'll think about cursive.

I think, if nothing else, *I* am getting smarter through homeschooling. I couldn't remember off the top of my head what a pronoun was the other day, a refresher course later - he, she, it, we, they! Oh yeah, I so rock. Not, I mean really, who forgets what a pronoun is???? LOL

"So, what are you going to feed your baby?"

Today I went to the dr's. I saw him for like a minute while he ordered an IV for me during my "orientation" and prescribed me a pill to take every 3 hours after my suppository.

So anyhow, the nurse takes me and this other lady into a room and starts a movie about having a baby. The other lady, this is her 5th pregnancy, and well you all know I'm experienced. So we're both just chatting during it. But there was this one part where you "scored" your pregnancy, that was pretty interesting. It was like a point system, 1 pt for spotting, 2 pts for previous c-sections, 4 pts for something else like diabetes, right? So anyhow I ended up with 8 pts total, I can't remember what they were all in, I wish I'd had a pencil. So the "score" is 0-3=normal pregnancy, 4-6=high risk pregnancy, and 7+= "Extreme" pregnancy. So with 8 pts I am having an "extreme pregnancy" LOL.

Then the nurse comes in and says, "So which formula are you ladies planning on feeding your babies?" and when I said "none" the nurse looked at me like I had 4 heads! She's like, "what are you going to feed your baby?" I almost didn't know what to say!! I was so shocked! I was like "Um, breastmilk?" And she just looked more confused and said, oh I never thought of that. She never thought of breastfeeding????? Anyhow she came back and gave us both Similac diaper bags filled with samples and said, "we don't really have very many people breastfeed I suppose, so here's a Similac bag."

What's weird is that my dr never said anything one way or the other last time...he was my dr with Justin. This is a brand new practice so I'm sure he's just getting himself established after having Kaiser furnish everything, but I was surprised there was NOTHING about breastfeeding!! So, he had left for the day by the time my "class" was over, but I plan on talking to him about this next time I go see him on April 2nd!!

"I never thought of breastfeeding?" Yikes!

Why Julius Ceasar?

I realized that I left out his reasoning for wanting to name the baby Julius Ceasar because when I wrote that post I ran to the bathroom to throw up and just hit "Publish".

Jakey thinks we should name the baby Julius Ceasar because he really liked learning about him in History. His name starts with a "J" (Like Jacob and Justin). He thinks it's cool Cesearean Sections were named after him, and that I'm having a c-section. And last but not least, Jakey's favorite food is Ceasar Salad. So those are his arguments for naming the baby Julius Ceasar...LOL

Um....no.

Anyhow, this afternoon Kevin's brother was pushing Justin on Jakey's bike and he slid backward off the seat, onto the tire. The tire was spinning so it pulled down Justin's shorts and "road burned" Justin's butt. There is a huge 4 inch square bruise and road burn on Justin's butt, like one inch above his tailbone, to three inches under it. I'm worried he broke his tailbone. Of course he had to do this after the dr's office closed for the day so I can't decide if it's "urgent care" he needs or not. He can't sit or he screams his head off, he can't shower, screams for that too...poor kid.

I whine too much....LOL

Anyhow, thank goodness the weather is warming back up! I had only saved our like 3 or 4 pairs of pants for everyone because the weather was getting so warm and then it started raining and I was starting to worry about having put away so many of the boys' winter clothes...but today it's going to be 70 and sunny - so we're back on for shorts.

Justin's going through this VERY dramatic phase....if anyone upsets him at all he starts screaming at the top of his lungs. I don't know what to do with him. I shouldn't be picking him up (he's 40 lbs!) but that's the only way to get him to time out because he just lays there and refuses to move (while screaming). I don't know what to do with him anymore....I've just about had it though, the high pitched screams are enough to send me over the edge. Did I tell you all about his new favorite passtime? Locking the bathroom doors around the house...nice. The other day he had 2 of 3 bathroom doors locked....brat!

Jakey is constantly "why?" But for the most part is fairly helpful but I feel like I'm talking to a brick wall, it's like, "I'm going to go upstairs and lay down for a few minutes, can you take that trash out and put a new liner in, please?" Jakey: "why?" CAUSE I SAID SO!!! I just look at him like he has lost his mind and tell him "get it done" while I go upstairs...

Seriously though, they've both been pretty good about letting me rest the past few days. Just have mouths on them LOL

Jakey wants to name the baby Julius Ceasar, um no....LOL

What a morning it's been already and it's only 8:30! The boys are just sooooo full of energy today! Justin would love to get his hands on something to write with and scribble all over the walls and after having a horrible experience with him at our last house I am VERY against that, so I keep a constant watch over him to see if he's doing it, and he's getting frustrated with me. Jakey has to be asked 37482372349237243 times to do something and I'm about ready to lose my mind from all the asking!! Seriously!

I've been "ok" this morning, but I can't take my medicine again until Kevin's brother and sister get here this afternoon because of how tired it makes me, so I feel my tummy churning and I know that I won't be able to hold down much until they get here. The dr's office wants a nurse to come and give me an IV for rehydration and nutrition because last night I was throwing up even though I was medicated. I kind of feel dehydrated a bit - like my mouth is dry, etc. I really don't want home health care, but I don't want to end up in the hospital more, so I guess it's all I can do.

Kevin's working a super long day today - he won't be home until 11 or 12 tonight. So this should be very interesting.

Our 90 degree weather is gone...LOL It's cloudy and cold, looks like rain today.

Anyhow I have a goal of cleaning the kitchen and teaching Jakey for a bit before getting too sick this morning so I better go.

Suppositories, yay!

I gave in and called the dr this morning, he called in a rx for phenegran suppositories...the pills just don't work for me, I can't keep them down. I just picked them up and I'm gonna go take a shower and take one and go to sleep for a few hours. I was up ALL NIGHT sick, sick, sick.

If I continue to throw up, he wants to send a home healthcare nurse to give me an IV, so I got some pedialyte and I'm hoping to rehydrate myself. Anyhow - I'll be back later, I'm gonna be sick again :(

Ugh, I'm gonna be sick!!

I've been SO sick all day today and I'm sitting here trying so hard to keep a little bit of dinner down so that I'm not so hungry. :( It's ok, I mean I'm beyond thrilled about being pregnant, I just don't feel good right now. But if it's possible, I kind of smile and throw up...LOL But I still feel sick.

I burned my knee at the park on Friday, it was the weirdest thing, just my left kneecap was burned, so strange! LOL But it's getting better. It was like 90 the past few days but I hear it's going to rain soon so the temp will go down.

Oh, guess what Kev got for his b-day? A flat tire! LOL Sheerly by the grace of God, we made it home from church. As soon as we got home we were walking in and noticed that the tread of the tire on the front passenger side was GONE....just wires showing! Kevin had to move the car so that we could bring in some of our patio furniture and the tire just completely deflated. I have no idea how we got home safely! Luckily Kevin's mother's husband works at a tire shop and he can get us a new tire cheap tomorrow. Kevin will probably be taking the day off to take care of that.

Anyhow I'm going to go to bed, I'm so exhausted, I want to sleep for a month. If I'm asleep, I'm not throwing up, right? LOL

ARGH

Well I chose not to bring up the incident last Friday to her when I spoke with her on IM and so we just talked about other things. Well then we were talking about this Saturday night when we're all supposed to go out for Kevin's birthday and she says that she is having her mom babysit tonight so she can go to the movies, and so she'll see if her sister can watch her kids tomorrow night but she's not sure if she can, and if she can't then she doesn't want to ask her mom cause her mom is watching her kids tonight, so can we do dinner on Monday. No, we CANNOT do dinner on Monday....for as long as we've been friends (5 years) we've done dinner the Saturday closest to our birthdays and we purposely didn't plan other activities for that weekend so that we could have babysitters and afford to go to dinner and such. ARGH. So anyhow she says she'll let me know tomorrow if they'll be able to go because of the babysitting issue. Seriously? I mean what the heck?!?

I'm seriously trying to gloss over my hurt feelings for last week for Kevin's sake cause it's his birthday on Sunday and her husband is his best friend, but seriously? I mean how freakin rude! They've never shown this huge lack of consideration for us before, ever. It's totally strange. Well if they can't go, I sure hope they enjoyed their movie. Ugh.

My ultrasound

It went well, there was a gestational sac, no fetal pole, or hb yet but the sac isn't measuring 6 weeks like we thought I was, which is a good thing, it likely means that I'm just not as far along as we thought. They don't want to officially change my due date until my next u/s.

The u/s tech was GREAT. She took an hour with me, going over what she saw, explaining how normal that is, showing me u/s' at my stage that look exactly the same that went on to have healthy babies, she was fantastic. Then she took me in my dr's office (like the kind with a desk LOL) and he said the same thing and gave me my options. I could go for bloodwork frequently to check levels, I could come weekly for u/s', do both, or just come back april 2nd when the baby will definately be big enough to see it's heartbeat and not stress about it. He said he'd do whatever I wanted and I chose to just go back April 2nd.

Sooooo, more info to come April 2nd - likely my new due date will be November 14-16th, somewhere in there. So I'll just keep praying!

Do you remember...

....the big green puking smilie that Tammy had up on Mormon Mommies? Yeah, that's how I feel. Big, green, smiling, pukey - that's me! It's ok though - it's worth it....just kinda hurts my throat a little. Oh and that tile floor is COLD...although it's like 80 so upstairs it feels good (cause hot air goes up) and downstairs it's just a little too chilly - but that's ok.

I got the insurance thing all figured out....I called Kevin to tell him the whole long story and he cut me off somewhere around "I called the insurance company and said..." and said to me, "Bottom line Dawn, do you have an ultrasound tomorrow or not?" and when I said I did, he said he had to go - and I started crying. I'm such a baby....so anyhow to keep from boring you all I won't repeat the long story - you can have the bottom line too - I have my u/s tomorrow morning.

Oh my goodness, I just broke up WWIII over Yu-Gi-Oh cards. Kevin's brother and Jakey are playing - and PJ used a "trick" card to look at Jakey's hand and defeat him. Yeah, did you care? I didn't. And I had to hear about it, for like 20 minutes, til my "Inner-King-Solomon" came through and I said, "Tear the card in two." Not cause I wanted to see who loved the card more, but because I wanted the card destroyed....so I guess I'm not so King Solomon after all. Just tired, and sick, and Yu-Gi-Oh is so L-A-M-E.

Taco Bell = Very bad!!!!

I can never look at a grilled stuffed burrito the same way again. :( ewwww.

Why is my morning sickness the worst in the middle of the night? Isn't that just odd? If I fall asleep, being queasy doesn't bother me too much, but if I have to pee, or I hear something that wakes me up, or Kevin snores to loud...I wake up, realize how yucky my tummy feels and blah....yuck.

So, a guy is coming to fix our dishwasher today!! I'm SOOOOOOOOO happy about that! I have had it TOHERE with washing my dishes by hand! (I know, I'm a spoiled brat!)

Argh, my dr's office just called and said that they haven't received my approval from my insurance for my ultrasound tomorrow, so I have to call tomorrow morning at 8:00 to be sure they got it so that it's even worth driving over there. If they don't get it, we'll have to reschedule. Kevin took the day off already! Grrr! I thiink I'll call at 4:30 this afternoon and see if they can check with my insurance so that we can decide if Kevin should just go to work or not. It needs to go through, I want to have my stinking ultrasound!!

Anyhow, time to unpack...I am seriously unmotivated today...blah!

So, an 801 phone number calls just a few minutes ago, and I think, "hmmm, who in Utah wants to talk to me?" It was a Sister from membership/records department of The Church. She gently says, "Sister Parnell, I know this phone call is going to be difficult for you, just because it seems out of nowhere...I'm trying to complete the membership record for your brother Denny Allen Truman, and I know he passed away, but could you give me the date for our records?" It did hit me out of nowhere, I obviously wasn't expecting anyone to call me and want me to talk to about Denny's death. To be honest, I couldn't remember the exact date, I had to look it up on the calendar - not that it was written down, just the exact date of the Monday in June he died on. June 12, 2006. My voice caught a little. I guess I don't think about it much. Even through all the drugs, he was a pretty good uncle, when he was sober and I'd let him be around my kids, and I'm going to have a baby he's never going to meet. I'm not saying this in a sad way, more like in a thoughtful way, like pulling up a memory or random thought, considering it for just a moment, and filing it back away in my mind.

I tried to grocery shop for 2 weeks about 9 days ago....I failed apparently. I have about half of everything I need to make anything. Apparently if you buy them, the boys will go through 2 boxes of cereal IN ONE WEEK. And a few other key peices of information like that, were not taken into consideration. I even wrote down a menu and menu-shopped for everything I needed, how did I end up this way?

How do you shop? How often do you shop? Do you use a menu? Do you run back to the store for a few forgotten items alot?

Since Kevin and I share the car, and I don't have it much, and by the time he gets home from work I'm too tired to go to the store I try to keep my grocery shopping to his days off, but I failed this time! He was getting paid weekly but now he gets paid bi-weekly so it's an adjustment. Oh well at least we have a few bucks to buy some groceries til payday, right?

Kevin's birthday is on Sunday and I don't know what I want to get him for his birthday. He wants a Wii, but we can't afford that right now since we're still recovering from moving and his unemployment. Jakey is buying him a gift certificate for the movies (2 tix, popcorn, and 2 sodas) so that he can take Kevin to see Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles next Friday when it comes out. (Trust me, I'm not disappointed I'm not invited!) Justin is buying him a few new ties, he lost all of his in the move. And I don't know what to do for him. He needs clothes, but hates getting them for his birthday, he needs a new keyboard for his computer but that seems lame....so I just don't know. Maybe I'll steal Jakey's idea and take him to the movies a few weeks later when something more interesting comes out LOL. We're going to Tahoe Joe's too on Saturday night and then hosting a BBQ here on Sunday afternoon. (It's a combination thank you for helping us move, happy birthday Kevin party)

Kevin's working around the yard today - which is nice because it means a shorter day than usual, but it can be hard on the budget because we don't live on 40 hour weeks, and Kevin's only going to have about 40, maybe 50 hours for this week, which can be a little scary. But I'm sure he'll make up the hours next week.

I have Jakey's 3rd Quarter phone conference this week, that kind of freaks me out because we're still working on 2nd quarter stuff. We're a little behind because of starting late, but I am feeling the stress to finish up in at least early August so we can have some sort of summer. His teacher is very no pressure, we have until October to complete 2nd grade, but I'd rather clear our slate and start 3rd grade on time, yk? Everyone keeps asking us if we're still going to homeschool now that I'm pregnant. Of course we are! I love the flexibility, I can make appts for whenever I want and not have to worry about a school activity or being out in time to pick Jakey up from school, it's great! His school is having an open house tonight, but most of our school stuff is not unpacked yet so we're not going to go. Instead we're going to have pizza and let him stay up to watch American Idol - it's something he's always wanted to do. I'm so glad that they moved "Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader?" to Thursdays at 8:00, I know he's going to love that show!

Is anyone else's kids bedtimes severely messed up from the time change? I don't think Justin fell asleep until 10:30 last night. And they're not waking up until almost 8:00. It's messing with our mornings! They're supposed to get up at 7:00, watch 2 cartoons and let me sleep til 8:00....now they wake up at 8:00, see that the cartoons they normally watch are over, flip off the tv and drag me out of bed without my even having one moment to start to wake up, to make them breakfast! And bedtime is a nightmare! Last night they kept jumping between their beds (we have them unbunked right now) and then pulled down some blinds....then they went in my room and Justin threw up all over my bed cause he had something in his mouth while he was jumping, choked a little, and puked everywhere to get it out. I was NOT happy with the two of them!

Anyhow I have to go clean the house because we're having a Primary Presidency meeting here at 1:00. We have a primary activity day this Saturday and so far only me and the president are going to be there....grrrr. And a teacher appreciation dinner next Thursday night....fun, fun!

Yawn

I don't have much to say, cause I'm too tired to think of interesting things! LOL

I did get my washer fixed today (well the washer wasn't the problem, the draining thingy into the wall was) and so now I can do laundry again. As much as I hate it, I missed clean, yummy smelling clothes. I LOVE the smell of my fabric softner!

So, you know you complain about your boobs alot when, your mom buys you 5 new bras in different styles and sizes so that you can maybe be comfortable again. LOL My mom hasn't bought me a bra since I was 12 - so I think it's hilarious, but very sweet of her. They all fit, just differently, so I am definately grateful cause I have outgrown all my bras.

I'm super excited about my ultrasound on Thursday - Kevin is taking the day off and we're going to the u/s and then out to lunch and then we'll pick up the kidlets.

You know what sounds good for dinner? Fried chicken...mmmmm....have to see if I have the energy for that later.....yum yum!

Anyone else missing that hour?

Whew! I am SOOOO tired! Missing that hour of sleep did me in! I finally finished doing stuff for sharing time around 12:30 and went to bed, I had to get up at 6:30 for an early AM meeting (which was really essentially 5:30 with the time change). I left church after I took the Sacrament, I just couldn't hang anymore. I was hungry and sick and TIRED, and my kids weren't there to keep me awake because Kevin's mom overslept and didn't get them dressed in ttime and Kevin was at work, so I was all alone. Kevin's mom dropped Justin off and we took the deepest nap ever for about 2 hours. It was the kind of sleep where it hurts to wake up.

Anyhow we're almost out of the other house - still garage stuff. Kevin's mom went through a ton of stuff in our garage and just brought over pictures and important things. Luckily Kevin's little sister wanted to stay and hang out so she's watching a movie with the boys and I'm going to go take a nap! Boy am I tired!

I do have a question for commenting on: Do you think Daddy/Daughter Dances are appropriate given the number of single-mom-dad-not-involved households that are becoming more common in wards? In our ward there are about 7 girls (Primary Age) without fathers who are active in their lives, whose mothers are recent converts, who might be hurt by that type of dance. What do you think?

Daylight Savings

Wow, can you believe it's already that time? I know it came early this year, but only really 3 weeks early, it's crazy! I'm sure that as I type this most of you all have already moved your clocktimes....I'm going to head to bed, lose my one hour of sleep, and get up super early for early morning meetings...LOL Night all, hope you remember to change your clocks!

You know what's frustrating?

When you invite friends over for dinner and they cancel after you've already defrosted enough food for them, and started dinner and worried all day and woke up from your nap early to be sure your house was clean enough for the SECOND time in two weeks. Grrrr.

Kevin picked up on my extreme hormonal state and grabbed the chicken off the counter, offered to boil it for shredding tomorrow, put it in baggies in the fridge, and QUICKLY made his way to the nearest take out place to grab dinner. LOL

I feel stupid cause I cried when I found out they weren't coming, but I couldn't figure out if it was because I had just spent 2 hours cleaning my house or because I woke up from my nap so I could spend two hours cleaning my house. LOL I've lost my mind. When I was pregnant with Justin I cried when my friend wouldn't sell me Kentucky during a game of Monopoly.

I feel like a big meanie!

A lady I hardly know in our ward just called and asked me to babysit for her this weekend. She's a single mom, and new to our ward, and I know it's hard for her but her kids are SOOOO difficult. And I have alot of commitments this weekend. (I have to clean my mom's house on Saturday Morning, Ward Fast and Testimony Meeting on Saturday night for Ward Conference, plus Sharing Time for Sunday when the Stake Primary Presidency will be there) and our car doesn't fit but 5 people and she has 2 boys.....so it just wouldn't work. I gave her the number of 2 other sisters in the ward who might be able to do it....but I feel bad cause I blurted out I was busy before she told me the exact times LOL....I'm such a jerk. I feel bad, if it were during the week I'd suck it up and do it - but on the weekends, it's SOOOOO hard to give up that family time too because Kevin works 60-80 hours a week.

Ok someone make me feel better about this, I feel like a total jerk, especially since she needs help - but man, what do you do? I wouldn't be able to take my own family to church if I watched her kids - everything else is all kind of smaller problems, but the church thing would be hard.

Argh. Plus I don't think I'm the best babysitter for my own kids right now - I'm soooooooo tired. LOL I bribed them to watch an hour of cartoons earlier so I could catch a nap. I should get the information I have about having the state pay for your daycare together so that she can use that program and find an "always" babysitter to help her whenever she has to work. (It's the program that paid me to watch the girls.)

Speaking of the girls, I know I haven't mentioned them in a while. They're living with their mother, remember? Well Erica is terrified to go to anyone's house because she's afraid her mom won't come back for her....so no one really gets to see her at all. She'll barely walk inside and say hi as long as her mom is standing next to her...she has real abandonment issues. And Natalle is doing great....she enjoys going to other people's houses - she says she likes staying with my mom and I over staying at her mom's because we buy her nice clothes and help her look pretty and make really good dinners (well I do, my mom's cooking is NOT good, but she orders in well LOL) - so I think Natalle just kind of misses the way her life used to be. She feels some devotion to her mother but she really still feels that for me too. She says she wants to write a Mother's Day card for me, but have it be a secret because she doesn't want to hurt her mommy's feelings, but she thinks of both of us as her mommy. She calls Tabatha her "real" mommy and me her "heart" mommy. I miss them so much, I wish that things weren't this way, but I'm sure as time goes on Erica will eventually come around and Natalle will adjust just fine.

Hmmmm, what else do I have to say before killing a few brain cells watching "Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader?" Oh tonight on AI, what the heck? Only 1 of those people deserved to go home! And what is Sanjaya doing there still? And Haley? Yikes.

Tomorrow is park play group! Yay! My fave day of the week. Kevin should be home from Utah sometime during the night tonight and then I can drive myself to the park for the first time in FOREVER. I'm sure my friends will appreciate it, although they all say they really don't mind. We've been going to another park because one of my friend's sons is afraid of the train at our normal park, which all the other kids love, and I honestly think it's cause she RUNS the second she hears the train coming, screaming "Micah, cover your ears! You'll get scared!" I'd be scared too if my mom did that! LOL so we switched to this other park - the bathrooms are grosser and there is a school right across the street and so when we stay til 2 we end up with a bunch of elementary school aged kids running through the playground our kids are on. I need to remember sunscreen, I've gotten sunburned the last 2 weeks! It's going to be like 80 tomorrow - yipee!! (don't throw sunscreen at me now LOL)

Now, what other mundane things can I bore everyone with? I should erase my title and name this post - Things Dawn Blogs About When Tired and Bored...

I have got to get pics of the house up - very soon, very soon. I can't find the cord to my camera right now - but I will find it soon.

Oh Kevin's trading me birthday dinners :) I don't care for Chinese AT ALL (I can sometimes handle shrimp and rice) anyhow he's been wanting PF Changs for his birthday for months, but since I don't feel particularly well he's letting me chose the restaurant for his b-day (On Saturday night before his actual b-day) and then when I turn 26 on June 1st he gets to chose the restaurant. Nice huh? I'm not sure I want PF Changs in June either, but I should be far enough along to stomach it by then. LOL So I'm thinking The Elephant Bar or California Pizza Kitchen - ever been to either? I haven't.

Ok, I'll wrap up this post now...it's almost time to wake Kevin up from his "nap" in Nevada so he can come home. I can't wait, when I get the kids home from the park tomorrow I'm going to CRASH and take a NICE long nap - ALL afternoon. Mmmmm, I can't wait!!!! (Isn't it funny how right before I go to bed tonight I'm already excited about the next time I can sleep LOL sleep is so precious!) Goodnight!

Oh how I have missed DSL

Rapidly loading webpages, phone line free, endless fast browsing....I have missed my DSL!!!! It feels faster than ever, but I can't decide if it's from having just used dialup for several days or if it's cause I upgraded my DSL? Oh well, how much faster do I need it? It loads immediately. Thank goodness I have DSL back!!!!

Beth - my ultrasound is next thursday :)

Oh and guess where Kevin is? Nephi, UT LOL He's driving to Spanish Fork and then west some to some little town in the middle of nowhere, hopefully he'll be home by tomorrow morning. He's having it rough because he was in such a hurry he didn't come home and pack anything and well it was 80 here in Cali yesterday and it's apparently REALLY cold in Utah today LOL....so he's not dressed appropriately and he forgot his gas card at a gas station here in Bakersfield. He's a nut. Hopefully he hurries home.

Anyhow I better do some lesson plans and teach Jakey - SOMETHING - today cause we've been slacking because of the move. Plus I need to unpack some more, Kevin's birthday is the 18th - he's gonna be 28! and we're having some family and friends over for dinner and I want the house unpacked and cleaned by then. My whole downstairs is tile and I DON'T want to sweep and mop it....anyone want to do that for me?

Anyhow I better go eat breakfast before I get sick, there is a fine line between hungry and sick and eating too much and being sick....I strive to stay somewhere in the middle and NOT be sick. It's ok, I'll totally take it, I'd rather be throwing up and pregnant and feeling great and not pregnant - but well you know - it's not great fun or anything. Kara knows how I feel about cereal too but really I can't make myself pancakes or eggs or something every morning! Anyone have non-cereal breakfast ideas?

Thanks for all the congratulations. We're really excited. We are more hopeful than ever, all of my labs are coming back fantastic and I haven't even been supplementing with synthetic hormones of any kind! So now we just make it through til the ultrasound so we can see this little person's heart beating!! I can't WAIT.

It's scary how different I feel than any other pregnancy. I have moments where I feel fantastic and then a second later I'm super queasy and my chest hurts and I'm exhausted....wait 5 minutes and it passes again. Except at night, by 8 pm I'm throwing up. We have a little portable tv that I watched American Idol on last night from the bathroom. There is apparently a fine line between eating just enough dinner and too much - I think I crossed the line. Right now though I'm going through the fantastic phase, which is great! :) (a little concerning but great...LOL)

Justin's finally starting to like the new house....I have to admit, the picture of Jesus being on the wall did help this house feel like home. :)

Anyhow, my SIL is over here today helping me unpack so I better get to it, one more day til DSL!!!! :) (I'll go around commenting tons as soon as my DSL works....it's so hard to get pages to load with dialup!)

ANNOUNCEMENT

This morning - it was confirmed by my doctor - I am PREGNANT! Due November 8, 2007!!! Can you believe it? I had a faintly positive test a while ago - like 2 weeks or so - and then chose to ignore everything to deal with the move. Last night I realized I had my annual appointment today and I was soooooo sick I thought - I don't want to give the stomach flu to anyone. So I was gonna cancel...then I thought - I'm going to take a pg test in the am if it's positive then I'll go, negative and I'll cancel. The test line was SOOOOO dark on the pregnancy test that there almost wasn't enough ink for the control line! LOL

So in I went, and I'm happy to report I am in fact pregnant....the dr examined me and said everything looks great. I have an ultrasound appointment for next Thursday. :)

100th Post and our move from Justin's perspective....

Yay 100 posts! Go me. LOL

Justin is having it so rough! He's still loving his bed but he tells me every night when I put him to bed that he wants to "go home". We lost Hank (his baby doll) and so he's REALLY upset about it. And right before the move one of his shoes went missing (while Kevin's sister was babysitting him) and so he's even further upset that his favorite shoe is missing. For the last two nights he's woken up in the middle of the night screaming at me to get up and put up our family pictures on the walls cause he can't sleep until it's done. Today I put up the pictures and he cried and was so happy to see the pictures and the big picture of Christ....he says, "Jesus is in our house again!" and seems happier. I feel so bad for him! Jakey could care less, he'd like to not move, but thinks this house is ok....I guess Jakey just handles change better than Justin.

I am making dinner in the crockpot because I've been unpacking all day - and all that's done is make me HUNGRY all day....grrrr. Anyhow Justin just came in to tell me, "Jakey's trying to kill me with a rock." So I better go figure out what that's about...

We're (mostly) moved!

On Saturday a bunch of Kevin's family showed up to help us move...at 8 pm. LOL So we moved last night and some today (shhhh, I know it's Sunday but Kevin can't take off during the week at all and they said he has to work next Saturday). Anyhow...around 9 pm the Primary President called (I'm still 1st counselor) and said that the music person and the counselor in charge of Sharing Time were both not going to be there, which one do I want? Considering that we had no internet and my printer at the time was not hooked up, I opted for singing time. Now I know a fair share about music - I can play the piano, to an extent - with practice...and I can lead music....but can I sing? No, not really. I don't think my voice kills people, I think it's just unremarkable....and definately alto and since we're talking primary songs you know how many of those rock alto parts....yeah none. Yeah so that was fun! LOL Kevin and the boys couldn't even find their church clothes so they stayed home today while I went. What a day it has been!

Anyhow we're moved in, but our internet won't be DSL until the 8th so until then I have dialup - YUCK. It takes forever for pages to load!! So, I probably won't be around a whole lot til the 8th....and I'll work on getting pics of the house and unpacking done by then. :) I'll try to update...as long as the dailup lets me.

Ahhhhhh, wonderful Friday!

Argh on American Idol - WHAT are Sanjaya and Antonella still doing there?!?!?!

Oh and I'm happy to report - I AM smarter than a 5th grader :) Have you been watching that show? I'm bummed it's on so late cause I would love to watch it with Jakey! There is so little on tv that is good for families to watch together, and this is wonderful! (Moves a little slow, but it's not bad LOL) So, are you smarter than a 5th grader?

Today is Friday - we're signing for the house today and it's park play day. It's going to near 70 today so YIPEE! We'll be at the actual park! We even convinced 2 newly married ladies in our ward (one expecting a baby, and one not yet having children) to come with us so we could get to know them better. The one who's not having a baby said she'd feel weird, but since one of my friends is in a cast (leg) and can't get up, she offered to give her 3 year old to her and so now she feels included LOL. It's gonna be fun! :)

Last night was our RS dinner and man I have never laughed so hard. One of my friends is turning 30 on Sunday so when they announced a seminar on aging (and she is not the oldest in the group at all LOL) we told her she should seriously consider attending while busting up. When the stake RS President said it was specifically about medicare we about lost it we had tears streaming down our faces trying not to laugh. It's especially funny to me, because even out of the two newlyweds, I'm the youngest in the group and I've been married the longest and have the oldest child - whoops! LOL

Tonight Kevin's mom is coming to get our boys and Kevin and I are going out to dinner with my parents and going to sign for the house (they're coming with us to look at the house while we sign, then we'll eat). The boys are staying at Kevin's mom's because our ward has a temple day tomorrow and I'm going down and Kevin has to work. Then when I get back we're having a packing party at our house - every woman in Kevin's family is coming to the house to help me pack the breakables (dishes, pictures, knickknacks).

So if I'm not back before tomorrow night - have a great Friday and Saturday!!! :)

We HAVE found a house!

We drove around looking for a place for a bit this morning and came across a cute house, in an adorable neighborhood. Very kid friendly, all 3 streets in the neighborhood have speed bumps on them to encourage slow driving and there is a walkway through the backs of all the houses that leads to a little park. Cute!

Anyhow it's 3 bedrooms and 3 full baths. Now usually you'd say "oh that's great 3 full baths, how neat." and then you'd realize that if you have 3 full baths, you have to CLEAN 3 full baths...so that is the downside to this house. But if that's the only real downside it's not that bad is it? LOL

Anyhow downstairs there is a HUGE kitchen, dining room, living room, full bathroom, laundry area, hallway with tons of cabinets, and a bedroom that's strangely huge with an alcove. It's all tiled, oh and there is a fireplace! (Not that we can light it because our air quality is so bad here we're only allowed to burn on certain days, but it's a novelty LOL) Upstairs there is a huge bedroom (that would be the boys') and it too has an alcove (it's right above the downstairs room) and a huge walk in closet. A full bath in the hallway, a bunch of linen closets, and the master bedroom. The master has it's own full bath (when I say full bath in these 2 of them even have seperate showers and tubs, so we're talking HUGE...like these bathrooms are the size of our smallest bedroom in our current house LOL) and two big closets. Outside there is a pond and a spot that used to have a hot tub but we could put a table in the gazebo where the hot tub used to be. A cute little garden...it's adorable. Not as big as our current backyard, but nice.

Anyhow we filled out an application and the lady said it's between us and some lady with two evictions on her credit (as she rolled her eyes) so we'll likely get it. They're running our credit and calling our references and they'll call us tonight to let us know if we got it. I hope we do, it's cute!

I wish I had remembered to take my camera so I could have taken pics! Anyhow we're packing so I'll be back later...hopefully with good news!

Edit: We HAVE the house! The lady just called us, we sign papers on it tomorrow, we'll start shoveling stuff over on Monday and be moved in next Saturday!

Last night's AI was good, the girls are mostly good. Antonella, Leslie, and Alaina need to go though!

My MIL brought over a ton of boxes last night and so I'm starting in on the packing today. I'm doing the school room first and just pulling out the things we'll need over the next 2 weeks and packing the rest so that the school room can be the room all the boxes go into.

This morning Kevin's off for a bit, so we're about to drive over to the neighborhood we'd like to live in and look for "For Rent" signs and get phone numbers, then today I'll call and set up appointments for Saturday to see the houses. Hopefully by early next week we'll have a deposit on something.

Tonight is our Relief Society Birthday Dinner. My mom is coming to our ward for it, and it should be fun. I'll just be glad to be getting out of the house at the end of a long day of packing the house up!! LOL

Anyhow boxes are calling my name...later!

I was just thinking...

about Kara's post (look I think I made a link!!!!) about dishes and though....

"I wonder what chores other people have their kids do?"

Jakey does unloading and reloading the dishwasher and setting the table for dinner. He also takes out all trash, cleans his bathroom a few times a week and makes his bed - and picks up his room mostly. Sometimes I have him vacuum here and there or put away some laundry - those aren't all the time things though. Oh and he feeds and waters the dog (I didn't want it, I'm not feeding it!)

Justin picks up his toys in the living room, removes all toys from the tub when Jakey is cleaning the bathroom, makes his bed, and puts his and Jakey's clothes in the hamper (His contribution to cleaning their room).

Sometimes I wonder if Justin needs more to do or Jakey needs less or if they're about at age appropriate? I've been having Jakey help with dinner a little more - like cutting the lettuce for the salad or stirring something on the stove for me, or putting biscuits on a pan for me to throw in the oven. I kind of feel like I will have failed them if they go on their missions or get married or go away to college or something and they can't do any of these things.

So, what chores do your kids do?

James Cameron and Jesus' Tomb

I don't have cable, so I won't be watching the Discovery Channel March 4, but what? He found Jesus' bones - interesting since Jesus is currently using them. Since when does finding ONE family's bones constitute as - the family of Christ? I mean whatever tests they do can show these bones are maybe 2,000 years old, DNA tests prove that this family is related, imagine that - people buried together being related to one another, who'da thunk it? And this disproves Christianity how? It kinda just feels like James Cameron is trying to ride the coattails of The Davinci Code success.

Let's talk American Idol

Ok Sanjaya...dude, he has GOT to go. WHAT was that?!?! Yeah, wow. Jared, mmmmm that boy was CUTE with his whole hand thingy he did! And Chris Sligh, really surprised me! Sundance too! Probably my two favorites tonight where that first guy (what is his name!?! He's got a cute wife and kid too! - looked this up too - Phil Stacey!) and Jared, followed really closely by Chris Sligh, Sundance, and the beat boxing guy. The Justin Timberlake-look-a-like sang well too. Overall, Sanjaya...not so good...him and that former back up dancer guy (Brandon Rogers, I looked it up) are my guesses to go home on Thursday. If I didn't mention them, they weren't particularly memorable for me. :)

So, what did you think?

MMMMM, Brownies!

I went all out tonight! I made baked lemon pepper chicken with cheese on top, ceasar salad, and shells and white cheddar. For dessert I made brownies!! I out did myself I tell ya! Best dinner in a long time, by far!

I need some help, the other day when I was at Vons I bought like 20 lbs of hamburger meat because it was on sale 50% off plus some other special sale/discount thingy (so said 20 lbs only cost me like $15) Anyhow we generally don't eat very much hamburger, like maybe 5 lbs a month - if that. But seeing as how we have 20 lbs of it, it just makes sense to use it right? We're not huge chili fans, that's a once a month - if that type thing for us. Spaghetti? Once or twice a month. Beef in our tacos? We prefer chicken but now and then that's fine. Meatloaf? Ok I just dry heaved. I like it ok but yeah not so much, like once or twice a year is more than enough. So WHAT in the world do you make with hamburger meat??????? Give me some ideas people! :)

We're Moving :(

It's a long, depressing story as to why, but we're moving. I'm upset because I really do love this house, but I guess the more we look around at our options it's ok. The most important things in this house are coming with us, eachother. :) My mom and Kevin are trying to get me to see the "ok" side of this and we went and looked at an apartment yesterday. I don't know if I can truly give up my backyard but we looked at an apartment complex that has a park and we will get the apartment right next to it, it also has a gym, clubhouse, 2 pools, hot tubs, etc. Seems like a really nice place. The 3 bedroom is almost as big as the house we have now...still seems a bit cramped though. Our other options are a housing tract over by some friends of ours that was built in the late 80's - over there we'll be in an actual house - smallish backyards, but almost all have pools, and right around the same price range as we're in now. So we have several options. We'd most like to stay in our ward - and likely we will.

Anyhow I spent the better part of yesterday crying and my nose was a mess last night so I took some benadryl and went to bed and man do I feel better this morning! I got a good night's sleep and now I'm ready to house hunt and start organizing this house for packing.

I'm such a slacker!

I just read Kara's blog and she just hit 300 posts! This is my 90th :) LOL

Justin's completely potty trained! As in wore-underwear-under-his-suit-to-church-and-had-NO-accidents which is of course the pinnacle of Potty Training success, right? :) It is! I'm so glad he's fully PT'ed.

The other exciting thing is that the boys got bunk beds this weekend. We put them up yesterday afternoon and all day Justin was trying to go to bed early LOL - so Justin slept in his bed last night (so did Jakey) and it was the earliest AND easiest we've ever gotten them to bed. This morning I told them to clean their room and they did it willingly because they LOVE the way their room is now with their bunkbeds.

I about had a heart attack this morning, Kevin went to withdraw cash to pay our car payment because we are out of checks and our card was declined, checked the balance we had more than enough, tried again, declined....back and forth and back and forth and finally I called them, they said that they weren't even showing us trying to withdraw - turns out - the ATM was broken! Yeah I about died of a heart attack because the ATM was broken!

Well the boys swear they're going to die of starvation if I don't make their lunch - so I must go do it and get them down for quiet time before they think they can start Curious George again - oh yes we bought Curious George the movie this weekend....seen it like 48927824823784 times and I am soooooooooo over Curious George! Blah! Justin is obsessed! Ok lunch....later!

It's FRIDAY!

Which means......PARK DAY! Woohoo! I love Fridays, I love hanging out with all my friends (well most of them) and watching our kids play and talking and talking and talking. Oh and snacking and snacking too. Remember - calories consumed at the park - DON'T COUNT! I was afraid all day yesterday that it wouldn't stop raining so that we could go but it's fairly sunny out there and they're not predicting anymore rain til Sunday - so yay!! It's slightly chilly (50's) so we'll be wearing jackets and boots for sure...but oh well! We'll be out! Yay!

Kevin's off today too - he put in 20 hours yesterday. We're going to make those ribs again for dinner tonight and have more friends over and play card/board games. I'm going to get the new Curious George movie for the kids to watch tonight while we play.

It's gonna be a great day - anyday where you spend 90% of it with good friends laughing - is a GREAT day! :) And today I'm even going to try to remember to take a few pics with my buds...gotta preserve those memories! :)

I think I may have underestimated Justin, I think he has been ready for PT for a while and both of us were just too lazy to do it! It started yesterday with some quarters for the ice cream man. He wanted an ice cream and I told him I'd give him a quarter towards it if he peed in the potty (or pooped), he did well, then he had an accident and lost some, and then in the middle of the night woke up to go to the bathroom, woke up first thing this morning and asked for underwear and hasn't had a single accident all day! At naptime he refused a diaper, and I told him if he has an accident I will take away a quarter but I'd let him try it - he woke up to poop and pee mid-nap, he's back asleep now - DRY! No accidents at all today...and no reminding him to go - he just does it. Ahhhh, finally! Now I do have a HUGE box of diapers I just bought that he likely isn't going to use LOL, oh well MONEY WELL WASTED I SAY!

I didn't want to go there but....

....seriously! I am sick to death of "news" shows being ALL ABOUT Anna Nicole Smith. Seriously! Ok, while I think it's sad she died (for her baby) she sort of led a lifestyle that contributed to it, it's really not THAT shocking that she died! Today's coverage on Today of the hearing about who should get custody of her body was the real "over the top" thing for me....This judge in Florida is an idiot! He makes rude comments all the time, refers to the witnesses and attorney's in unprofessional ways. It's amazing he's still the judge! I don't know but to me it seems very "open and shut" she bought plots in the Bahamas - that shows her intention of being buried there - as long as she can legally be buried there (since she isn't a resident) then SEND HER THERE! DUH! If she cannot legally be buried there - then California (her actual residence!) seems the next logical step! And Howard K. Stern isn't doing her any favors by keeping her mother away from her in death. Having a brother who was sometimes estranged from our mother and I who did NOT support his drugged out lifestyle - I can guarantee that in death ANS no longer "hates" her mother - she's probably thinking, "Oh crap, she was right! Drugs will kill me!" Obviously ANS didn't want to be buried in Texas, so that really shouldn't be an option. But seriously I have ZERO years in law school, and I feel a better judge of this case - SEND HER BACK TO THE BAHAMAS IF SHE CAN LEGALLY BE BURIED THERE AND GET THIS "NEWS" OFF CNN, MSNBC, FOX, AND ALL THE OTHER "NEWS" CHANNELS!

I loved that today Matt Lauer said something to the effect of, "why don't we know who the baby's daddy is? Maury Povich would have figured it out in two days!" EXACTLY, swab the baby dang it! Although at this point they're going to have to DNA test every man in the WORLD to figure out who that baby's daddy is! (Including men already in the grave!)

The moral of the story - Drugs are bad, wills are good.

Now that I have WASTED my BLOGSPACE with this person, back to my regularly scheduled blogging!

The time is now....

.....2:49 pm pacific standard time....and we have DRY underwear. :)

So, we were only able to wear our winter clothes for a short time this year! It was fairly warm until late November, then terribly cold through January...it's February now though and 70 degrees most days - so I think it's safe to locate our capri's and tee's again. Sandals too. I'm kind of sad my winter clothes didn't really get a work out this year - barely got them out and it is time to put them away. But it is beautiful outside.

The mornings are still a little chilly - in the 50's usually. So Kevin turns on the heater - I don't know why - and by 7 am when I wake up I'm ready to pass out from the heat! I turn it off as quickly as possible and then open doors and windows to cool the house down again! He's a nut.

So we've come up with our "plan of action" for potty training Justin. He gets 1 pair of underwear per day, if he pees or poops in them - he goes back into diapers and gets to try again tomorrow. If he makes it to bathtime (at 6:30) then he gets a Chuck E. Cheese token - when he has 30 we'll go to Chuck E. Cheese. I didn't think he'd get it because it's kind of elaborate - but he totally did. He peed and pooped (glare) in his underwear yesterday right before his nap (after using the toilet 3 or 4 times before that) and when I took away his underwear he said, no token? I told him nope, he could try again tomorrow, and he said ok. Then at bathtime he said underwear tomorrow? When I told him yes he said, ok I'll potty in the toilet for my token at bathtime tomorrow. So I think he does get it. We're making a bag (paper lunch bag) for him to keep them in today (he's going to decorate it). Hopefully he'll be potty trained soon. I just need to find something to settle him enough to actually use the bathroom when he's sitting on the toilet he's usually a little anxious and worked up over it....maybe it just comes with time?

Today we're gonna finish up some units of Jakey's school work and I'm going to work with Justin on his shapes....he's got circle down, next we're gonna do square. I think that if he gets his shapes down he'll start to be able to print letters.

I feel like I need to "Spring Clean" too and get rid of clothes that don't fit the boys so that I can see how many shorts/tee shirts they have and we have. Definately something I need to get started on....I should also get those pics uploaded....anyhow what am I doing sitting here?! I gotta get stuff done! :)

Being a grownup stinks sometimes.

The worst part about the unemployment is getting back in the groove. Paychecks are starting to trickle in, and unemployment (from the weeks he was unemployed) and it's like "what do we want to start on?" The money we owe relatives? We arranged all of our bills, kept up with the situation, so no one bill in particular is "behind" per se, but they could all use some payments LOL, but it's like where do you even start? Thank goodness for our family, in particular our mothers - Kevin's mom who has so little herself has amazed me with her giving and sharing with us during our time of need. Very inspirational. My mom gave, not necessarily always willingly or happily or with true charity LOL (probably much like my charity LOL) but she did it and saved us a ton of stress and money in late fees, and kept us in food and electricity.

First and foremost, tithing. Seriously, I have a stronger testimony of it now than ever. You NEED those blessings, we NEEDED them. We could NOT have survived without them. This taught me too that we need to be more charitable because we really aren't. Kevin's mom defintely struggles and is in no way financial secure, and she totally bent over backwards to help us by little things like buying medicine when I was sick, or meat when it was on sale, or filling up our gas tank when it was low....just these little things to be supportive. Financially it doesn't even add up to much - but her help kept us from going under, and it taught me alot about service and charity.

Overall though, we were definately blessed through this whole ordeal. Our families came through for us, and we're ok. We're better than ok....I'm so glad too, because there was a little while there where I was really struggling - and just as I started to lose the faith that it would all be ok - it suddenly was.

"All I want for St. Patrick's Day is my two front teeth!"

That's what Jakey is singing now that his two front teeth came out yesterday! LOL He says that Christmas is too far away and he doesn't want to look silly til Christmas so he hopes they come in by St. Patrick's Day. The toothfairy left him $4 (in ones) and a letter to remind him to brush his teeth! I'll upload pics of him and his missing teeth and Justin's birthday party in a little bit during Justin's nap.

Yesterday I went to my mom's house and cleaned and did all that stuff that she wanted me to do for her, so today we're staying home and working on the house and school. (Well and yesterday was a school holiday).

We need to blast through a ton of subjects so today we're going to do ALL Math, tomorrow ALL Language Arts, Thursday - all science, and Friday - all history....LOTS of lessons, at least to get through to the end of the unit we are currently working on....I just want to get a ton done so we can get closer to finishing this semester (we're still on 1st semester and it's actually 2nd semester.)

Not much new and exciting is going on here - Kevin doesn't care too much for the schedule of his new job, but the pay and work have not been bad at all - so he's content. Yep, so not much new or exciting right now....I'll be back later with pictures!

Boy am I stuffed!

I just got done cleaning up all the mess from Justin's birthday party! Whew! Isn't it silly how we clean our houses when we're going to have a bunch of people over and then they come, the house gets destroyed, and we're back to square one? LOL Well I don't know, my house had gotten pretty bad during my depression over Kevin's work so I think even through the remaining mess (which isn't much really) it's a 1000X's better than it was before the pre-party cleaning.

Anyhow, Justin got his Diego bike...I took a video of him as he walked in from church this afternoon and saw it, he just kept saying "That's weird! That's weird!" it took him a little bit but he warmed up to the bike, it looked really big, but once he got on it it fits him perfectly and he can cliimb up onto it himself so he really did well with it! We even had to raise the training wheels already a bit because he was doing so good, I think he's going to get them removed before he's potty trained even! LOL (I did remind him though that 3 year olds with Diego bikes go potty in the toilet, we'll see if he lives up to that! LOL)

My mom and Kevin's mom and her family came, and then our good friends from our ward came with all their kids - at the height of the party we had 19 people crammed in our house (it started to rain once everyone got here). Kevin made ribs - he did this interesting thing where he put them in the crockpot with onions, garlic, and Dr. Pepper for several hours (while we were at church) and then pulled them out and poured BBQ sauce over them and baked them for another hour in the oven...they were FANTASTIC. Everyone raved about them, and pork haters loved them! (I don't mind pork, but am usually not a fan of ribs, these were good though!) Justin was hilarious because everytime someone walked in with a present for him he grabbed it from them and opened it - right then, so there were no pictures to be had of him opening presents because he just did it as they came....I guess it kept us from getting a huge mountain of wrapping paper. Thankfully he got lots of bath stuff, toys and all that, and this really cool Nemo toothbrush and holder and all of that, and it came with 2 toothbrushes so Jakey got one, and they were both excited to share the bath gifts.

All in all it was a great day, good friends, good food, good celebration! His cake was SOOOOO cute....the cookie monster cupcake cake turned out adorable, everyone commented on it, and at cutting time saw the benefits to a cupcake cake ("here's your cupcake!").

Now onto the matter at hand - not having a 3 year old in diapers anymore!

Last night, I was 15 again for a while!

Last night was SOOOOOOOO fun! We had dinner (with the grownups aka "old people" in our ward LOL) and then the lights went down and the disco ball went up, and the DJ cranked it up and all of us headed out to the dance floor in true "Youth Dance" style! We YMCA'ed, did the Electric Slide, and it was so fun!! We had a blast! And of course danced with our husbands on slow songs.

KARA! The last song was "When You Say Nothing At All" and I thought of you! During the last song I was holding my friend's baby (he's a cute little 4 month old!) while Kevin and I were dancing little Christian was between us, and man it did make me want a little one more than most moments....but eh, what can ya do!

Anyhow it was a total blast! Kevin and I were talking this morning that there should be a tri-stake (we have 3 stakes in our town) adult only dance every now and then so we can really have fun! The music was good and we didn't have to worry about inappropriate songs or anything, it was great! We even got some friends of ours that moved out of our ward to come to the dance last night, and a new young couple that's moving in to the ward next week to come!

Well now I have to go back to being a 25 year old mother of 2, who has to clean her house because lots of family and friends are coming over tomorrow for Justin's birthday dinner after church. And let me just say, my legs are telling me "You're not 15 anymore!" loud and clear!

"Hey Kev, leave the carseat on the porch please."

"Hey Kev, leave the carseat on the porch please."

"Hey Kev, leave the carseat on the porch please."

"Hey Kev, leave the carseat on the porch please."

"Don't forget, carseat on the porch, thanks!"

You'd think ONE of those would get through....ARGH. Now I have a ride to the park and only the smelliest old carseat we used to use that still fits Justin but STINKS from cat pee cause Kev never listened to the 300 times I told him to put THAT in the GARAGE. Well I sprayed Febreeze - that's all I can do. That and glare angrily at the stupid carseat.

Anyhow, it's Justin's birthday! So you can continue to find my morning humorous you'll be glad to know that my cupcake pan has disappeared and so to make "cupcakes" for the park I put cupcake liners in a 9X9 pan (9 of them) and now they're "square-cakes" They really look quite funny, Justin could care less, and I'm beyond embarassed! Everyone already kind of pokes fun at my cooking cause I am not the world's greatest cook and I don't even keep sugar or flour in my house, now everyone's gonna think I'm seriously awful at it. Sigh, I'm never gonna be Betty Crocker, or Sara Lee - I'm going to be the Go-To-Albertson's-And-Buy-Premade-Woman FOREVER. Who messes up CUPCAKES, ahem square-cakes?

And Justin's new habit for being 3:

J: Mom I'm peeing in my diaper.

Me: Well go to the potty then.

J: No, I think I'll just pee in my diaper.

Me: But you're 3 now, 3 year olds pee in the toilet.

J: Well maybe only 3 year olds who have Diego bikes do that.

I think I'm being blackmailed!!! I mean seriously, there have been a few times where his logic has been so there that I'm like, why aren't you potty trained yet, when you can think of all that. But now I'm convinced, he's blackmailing me!!!

Anyhow I have a 2nd batch of "Square-cakes" about to come out of the oven, do you think icing will help this situation? I should post a pic, but then you'll all laugh so hard you might get hurt, falling out of your chairs and such....oh man, I failed "Bake Your 3 Year Old Cupcakes For His Friends At The Park 101" - I'm such a failure!!!!

5 Things

Kara tagged me and I haven't figured out how to make her name a link to her blog, but she'll forgive me for it I'm sure.....so 5 things about me, I didn't do the original 5, (I don't think I was tagged?) sooooo here's my 5! I wonder if there are 5 things no one knows about me!

1. I dispise Top Ramen! I will not eat it, no matter how poor we ever get...I'd rather starve!

2. I love Days of our Lives and Passions - I don't watch every day - just 2-3 times a week - but I do read it online at www.soapoperafan.com whenever I miss!

3. Along the lines of Kara's so she won't feel so clutzy - I broke my big toe playing indoor soccer in highschool (2 weeks after I got my driver's permit!!!) and never had to take PE again, I had to do it out of a book - cause of insurance reasons. (by book I mean I had to learn the rules for football and other sports...just ask me what a 2 Pt conversion is! Or what professional sports teams names do NOT end with S!)

4. I slammed my leg in the car door this Sunday...it REALLY hurts now still on Thursday!

5. I'm afraid of escalators - like TERRIFIED of them. When I'm shopping I take the elevator. I can manage to go UP sometimes but NEVER down, it makes me sick to my stomach just thinking about it!

Ok so now you know how weird and clutzy I am! I tag Maren - and give her some time to do it because she's working - but she needs to update her blog anyways! :)

Sickies and Lysol

Man, Kara gave me her sicky-ness! ;) Yesterday my throat hurt, and my ears itched - I felt slowly all day long like I was getting worse and worse and worse and then last night it was into full blown SICK. The kind where you can't lay down or you won't be able to breathe. Not good. Kevin was off for 5 weeks, and I NEVER got sick, now he's back and work and I'm sicker than a dog! Not fun! And Justin's sharing this cold with me too - stinker!

Today is Justin's last day of being 2 years old! I can't believe that he's going to be 3, it's amazing how fast the last 3 years have flown by! I was hoping that he would be potty-trained by his 3rd birthday but I don't see that happening today - so um, guess not. LOL Funny thing is, he has ALWAYS done things based on his due date...like walking - he didn't walk until his due date (when he was 1) so he was 13.5 months old before he walked....he's always done things 6 weeks later....so I kinda wonder if PT will be the same, like his body just knows, he's not "really" 3 until March 25th? (A mommy can hope!)

Kevin's at work again today - working 6 am - 6 pm and the same tomorrow. I'm glad about that because Friday night we have a dinner/dance (adults only) that we want to go to, and he'll be off by 6:00 so while we'll probably be a few minutes late - we'll still get to go! And we have good reason to celebrate!

A friend was going to help me make Justin's birthday cake today - but we decided to put it off til Saturday because she's feeling the same way I am. We're gonna try either a pan cake of Cookie Monster or the cupcake thingy - or maybe both depending on how many people we think are going to be here Sunday afternoon. Right now the head count is around 25.

So those were just random, I'm going to go comment on everyone's blogs - don't worry I'll Lysol my keyboard before I leave a comment, I don't want you all getting sick! ;)

Guess where Kevin is?

AT WORK!


SIGH

That is me sighing a HUGE sigh of relief....I was at a friend in my ward's house when he called to tell me he was hired and staying there to work the rest of the day and they all said when I got off the phone (Kevin called me there) that I looked my age again and like a million pounds had been lifted off my shoulders...trust me, it has!!

Well, at least I'm in a better mood today! I had a few moments that were rough, but overall I'm feeling pretty good today. Thank you for the comments about yesterday, I'm sure that prayers offered in our behalf are what's helping me to turn this around. We finally got the paperwork all straight for Kevin's check - so we should have it by Friday at the latest, we're REALLY hoping that it'll be here on Thursday. Some of our friends are offering to bring soda, or whatever small things they can to turn the birthday party into a "potluck" which is nice. There is a $20 bike at Walmart and Kevin swears that Justin won't care that Diego isn't on it as long as he gets a bike, so that's something I'm considering but I might see if my mom will help with it, cause I just feel like he doesn't ask for much, he should at least be able to have the bike he wants, yk? The guy said he'd have Kevin come in for the drive test today but never called back....so I just don't know...

In good news, I feel so crafty! I am NOT a crafty person AT ALL and I was asked to come up with the craft for tomorrow's Valentine's Day party we're having. Well after browsing a few things online, I came up with these adorable little potpurri satchel heart shaped thingies that hang from a door knob...and I had ON HAND everything but the ribbon, which I got for $1 at the $1 store! Yay! I made one to show the kids how to do it and it turned out really cute.

In other news, Jakey got a 100% on his spelling test, this is HUGE. He CANNOT spell at all, and is very literal with spelling, everything is very phoenetic...but he REMEMBERED!!! H-A-L-F spells half, and T-R-U-T-H spells truth!! Yay! I finally felt like I accomplished something as far as teaching him to spell goes.

Kevin and I spent one hour cleaning the house and it felt so good to just do it....I HATE cleaning and I'm SOOOO depressed right now but it really had to be done. Plus i'd just had a long phone conversation with a friend who's wearing a cast on her leg after foot surgery and she was cleaning her house and it made me feel like a slacker. LOL So we scrubbed for an hour and then played rock, paper, scissors to decide who would vacuum...I won! (I usually win, Kevin ALWAYS puts out scissors.)

Anyhow I had a few breakdowns today, especially when Justin would tell me how much he wants the Diego bike for his birthday, or when Jakey told us he's on the last boss on Kingdom Hearts (the first one) and really wants to get the 2nd one (isn't that lame to cry over?) and then I cried cause he's about to lose his front teeth and I keep hoping they hold out a little longer so that the toothfairy doesn't have to come right now. I'm overly emotional right now...it stinks.

Anyhow, I didn't want my last post to be the one that was up anymore - it's going to be ok. We'll just keep praying and paying our tithing and it'll be ok, I'm sure of it.

Right now, things are just not good. Kevin has got to get back to work.

He had a bit of a cold over the weekend and this morning he woke up and straight away called this guy who wanted him to come in for a drive test. Well, while Kevin is mostly over the cold, the very first few words you say while recovering from a cold should not be said to a prospective employee, then Kevin admitted to having been sick, and bam, the guy didn't want him to come in and do the drive test...he doesn't want to get sick. So I spent most of the day frustrated.

His work has STILL not paid us for hours he earned on January FREAKING 23rd, and any of his sick or the rest of his vacation time. On Friday he told me that he would have a check overnighted to him, and then today I hear him on the phone with a guy when I told him to check on it and he was JUST NOW requesting it...I just don't know what to do...I know that he's not telling me things cause he doesn't want me to stress but I'm about to freakin explode if I find out one more thing was a "half" truth or what I consider a LIE.

We finally reached the bottom of our "barrel" we only had savings for 4 weeks, today started week 5...bills are due. I had to suck it up and ask my mom for help. I'm devestated. I'm cleaning her house for some money, and I had to ask her for more. I feel horrible. Then to top it off Valentine's Day is in 2 days and while I have no intentions of buying Kevin ANYTHING, I want to be able to afford $3-4 at the DOLLAR STORE to buy some crafty stuff for the boys for Valentine's party we're having with another family that's homeschooled. Justin's birthday is friday and all he wants is a Diego bike...I have planned on getting it for him but we just CANNOT afford the $65 bike and helmet and all that right now...I don't even know how we'll afford a party for him, supposedly everyone's coming on Sunday at 3:00 I don't know what I'm going to serve them - or where I'll get the $$ for a present for him.

So there you have it, the whole truth. It's hard to hear, it's hard to live, it's hard to type. I'm so scared that we'll lose something (Power, phone, our car, our HOUSE) that I can barely eat or sleep. No, we haven't talked to the bishop. My mom said that we could, if we wanted, but she would rather help us as long as she can. I just don't know what we're gonna do...when someone is going to hire Kevin, or what I should do. I feel like I can't sit here and watch my life fall apart and I can't do much to stop it...not many people realistically are looking to pay a decent wage to someone who hasn't worked in 4 years.

I shouldn't even post this, it's very raw, and it hurts to tell others what's going on, but this is real right now, it's really what's happening, and it really sucks.

Another Update

Kevin's still not working, but there are tons of interviews, background checks, drug tests, physicals, etc. going on right now. We're at the phase where we don't want to put all of our eggs in anyone's basket, so we're just going through the process with everyone. We have 3 options right now.

Option 1: On call mostly - you do get your 40 hours, plus some, but you might have to work some Sundays here and there and go out of town 1-2 days a week. Pays really well, decent benefits but not for 3 months.

Option 2: Monday - Friday 5am to when the route is over delivering beverages. Pay is decent, benefits are entirely paid for for our whole family by the employer, will never work on Sunday because the beverage is beer and it's illegal to deliver beer on a Sunday. (And people say Californian's have no morals! Lookie there we have a law about delivering beer on Sunday!) But in case you missed it - it's delivering BEER. Hmmmmm.... Kevin had an extensive interview with this guy and he said he's had a few LDS people work there and it conflicts them greatly but they obviously don't drink the stuff and are grateful when they have a load full of mostly other stuff besides beer. And they usually go union and deliver for Pepsi (go figure! LOL) within a few years of experience from his company.

Option 3: Great schedule Monday - Friday 8-5 and saturdays 8-2 but not very good pay, insurance doesn't start for 6 months, and Kevin would have to work 6 days just for us to HOPEFULLY make it.

We're probably leaning towards 1 or I hate to say it 2....I don't know yet.

That's about it for us, this job thing has been pretty all consuming. Hopefully something turns into "come to work today" for him.

Thou Shalt Blog.

I feel like even though not much is going on, I should still blog...so here I am!

Well our cycle of Clomid, didn't work. Ho hum, whatcha gonna do though? I have another refill of Clomid but I'm not doing it this cycle, and I'll explain why a little bit further into this post. I was frustrated but at least my cycle was like clock work and I didn't have much guessing. I decided also that cycling every 30 days-ish, soooooo not what it's cracked up to be! I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow and I'm sure he's going to pressure me into more IUI's and injectible drugs, etc. but right now isn't a very good time.

Kevin's work has been exceptionally slow, in fact today begins week four of NO WORK. It'd be fine and all, you know, if the kids didn't like eating or living in a house. But they do so we've been busting our hiney's trying to get him a job somewhere else. We filed for unemployment for lack of hours and the city interview came and went and a little letter came in the mail on Friday that said "We've decided not to include your name in the recommendations for new hires." That really devestated Kevin, he's never interviewed for a job he hasn't gotten. He just sits there and says "what did I do wrong?" I try to reassure him that it's probably nothing HE did but maybe they had a ton of people apply with more years of experience or something. He doesn't buy that. Today he's at a temp agency, and later he has 2 interviews. If nothing solid comes from those, like "ok be here tomorrow at 8:00 am for work" then he'll be going back to work for Halliburton through the temp agency. I hated when he worked for Halliburton before, it's ALOT of hours. Like 100+ hours a week....you LIVE on site until a job is done, so he'll be like 10 miles from home, and not able to get cell service (middle of the desert on an oil rig) and not be able to come home for 24-72 hours at a time. Not my idea of fun. So, hopefully something else pans out.

And this would be the reason why we're not going to do fertility treatments for a few months. Obviously it's just not a good time. I won't be taking birth control (that would be an even bigger waste of money) so something could happen, but likely it won't. I'm upset about it, but in a way relieved. I went to the park with some friends on Friday, but this time some more sisters from my ward were able to make it, and there are alot of them that are DONE having babies. Seeing them, and being around people I know aren't going to have more, I realized, maybe it's not so bad to watch the last one phase out of things and be relieved that you don't have to do that again, yk? Maybe I should just look at Justin as though he's my last and enjoy it and get excited about the phases yet to come. Enjoy having older children and more freedom that comes with that and stop resenting those who have babies and I don't. Most of these other women are coming at this phase in their mid-late 30's and after having 5+ children, but there is no reason why after 8 years of "child bearing" and only 2 children, I can't move on. I actually felt kind of peaceful about it. I held a baby, and it cried and I didn't long to have a baby that I could nurse when handing it back to it's mother, I was inside a little happy that I didn't have to lift my shirt up in 40 degree weather to nurse him! LOL So maybe I'm getting out of this phase? We'll see how these next few months of "not trying" go.

We signed the boys up with a program through Kaiser so they're going to have insurance (relatively cheap for private!) and we're buying COBRA for me (and Kevin) because private insurance won't touch me with a 10 foot pole, so it's COBRA, but it's not too bad, by not having the boys on it, we're paying just as much for it as we were through payroll at Kevin's employer, so it's not the end of the world.

What else is there to update on? I just did Jakey's report card from the 2nd quarter and end of the 1st semester of school. He is at grade level in a lot of things, and approaching it in the others....he's not above or below grade level which is just fine with me. That's exactly how he has always been, average, and that's good. He enjoys homeschooling and so I think we're going to do it again next year...hopefully we finish this year LOL starting in October really messed us up, but we're getting there.

Justin's still not potty trained. He will go, on his terms. And he WILL NOT poop in the toilet, only pee. So I'm not sure what I'm going to do with him, but his reasoning skills are getting better every day so hopefully along with that will come the "able to be bribed" skill set so I can work on this...LOL

Anyhow it's time to teach Jakey school and clean the house a bit, before Kevin gets back from looking for work. I hope something pans out.